Empathy: Why It Matters, and How to Get It

Given the precipitous decline in empathy in our culture during the past 40 years, this book can only become more important with each passing year. Beginning with a history of the concept, and a thorough explanation of why it's NOT precisely the same as sympathy or compassion—both essential & humane qualities, of course, and certainly building blocks of empathy—the author delves into specific aspects of empathy.One of the first points he makes is that the common perception of "human nature" as being utterly self-centered & self-serving is more a social construct than an irrefutable genetic fact. Yes, of course we can be self-centered … but as explains, much of that is due to being raised in a hyper-individualistic, "me first & only" culture. Using both critical studies & anecdotal evidence, he builds his case for empathy as being just as much our natural inheritance & birthright.Another point that he makes in distinguishing empathy from sympathy & compassion, is that empathy is defined not so much by initial feelings (although those feelings must be there), but rather as acting upon those feelings. In other words, empathy is not just something that you FEEL, it's something that you DO. It may begin within the person, but to be fulfilled, it must be expressed outwardly, in some concrete & tangible way. Really, empathy isn't about You, it's about the Other … or You in relation to the Other.The author then discusses how we may increase our empathy, presenting it (based on many scientific studies) as a potential that isn't irrevocably written in stone, but can be developed, nurtured, encouraged. He offers some basic approaches to that development, but wisely doesn't try to lock them into the simplistic framework of a self-help book with its bullet points & numbered steps. Philosophy comes into play here, as he proposes empathy as more of a holistic way of being, rather than merely a program or script.This isn't the last word on empathy by any means. but it is a fine starting point for a quality we desperately need in an increasingly divided, callous world. Most highly recommended!

This is an amazing book it is challenging to try and change my thinking but it is very enlightening.

Great book with practical suggestions for increasing Empathy. I am using it as a resource for an independent study unit for a student who expressed the thought that he lacked empathy.

Krznaric is no mug. Starting with the discovery of the mirror neurone, which seems to explain how humans can be empathic, he provides a practical road map for exercising and developing one's empathic capacities. The book is easy to read, full of interesting examples, and well referenced and indexed.I searched in vain for any reference to an explanation of just how our brain's empathic ability works--a psychology of empathy perhaps. It's surprising that Krznaric seems not to have heard of René Girard. As one reviewer here observes, mirror neurones perhaps work both selfishly and selflessly. Indeed, Girard's work explicates that.However, the triumph of books like this one is that they help us to knock down the myth of Individualism that pervades so much of existence today. The alternative, that humans are social inter-dividual beings is becoming clearer. Whether we shall use our interdividuality for empathy, or resentment and scapegoating, depends on how well we begin to understand ourselves.

This book has made me see things differently. I used to be selfish and impulsive. Im now more mindful with things I say, how I act , and how I respond. Quote from the book: "So many relationships fall apart because at least one person feels that their needs and feelings are not being listened to and understood." This can mean with a lover, friend, parent, or at work. One of my favorite quotes so far "You are, Therefore I am."

That was a great adventure reading this book, at the very beginning I felt my brain been squeezed, but at the chapter three I got used to the challenged proposed by Roman, and I decided to improve my listening as one technic to understand Empathy

For a used book, it is in very good condition.